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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
them funny. |
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of blonde one liners and other funny jokes |
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Aviation Joke
Another flight Attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: 'We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal. '
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Bed Joke
I was once in a play called Breakfast In Bed. Did you have a big role? No, just toast and marmalade.
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Funny College Joke
your mamma is so ugly, when she was born, she had an incubator with tinted windows, your mamma is so ugly, the doctor's still smacking her ass. your mamma is so funky, she used secret and it told on her. your mamma's drawls is so funky, roaches checkin' in but not out. your mamma is so fat, can't wear daisy dukes, wears boss hoggs. your mamma is so fat, police use her as a road block. your mamma is so fat, needs a six-piece bikini. your mamma is so old, she reads the bible and reminises. your mamma's cooking is so bad, the homeless gives it back. your mamma is so short, her feet swings on the toilet.
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Accountant Joke
The accountant's prayer: Lord, help me be more relaxed about insignificant details, starting tomorrow at 10. 53:16 am, Eastern Daylight Saving Time.
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Kids Joke
An 8 year old boy walks home from school each day past an 8 year old girls house. One day as he is passing by, carrying a football, he can't resist taunting the girl. He holds up the football and says, 'See this football? Football is a boys game, and only boys can have a football!'. The little girl runs into the house and cries to her mother, 'I want a football!' Being a woman of the 90's, her mother runs out and gets her one. The next day the girl is waiting for the little boy and he rides up on his bike. She holds up the football, 'Nah Nah Nah Nah'. The little boy angryly points to his bike and says, 'Oh yeah, well this is a boys bike and only boys get boys bikes and you can't have one!' She runs in to mom and the next day is waiting for him on her new boys bike. The little boy gets furious and pulls down his pants, and pointing to his most private of parts says, 'Look, only boys have these and your mom can't buy you one!!!'. The next day he walks by and asks her, 'Well, I guess I showed you!' to which she promptly pulls up her dress, points to her parts and proclaims 'My mother tells me that as long as I have one of these I can have as many of THOSE as I want!
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Music Joke
Q. Why do bagpipers leave their cases on their dashboards? A. So they can park in handicapped zones.
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Blonde Joke - 2
Q: What do a blonde and a car have in common? A: They can both drive you crazy.
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Bumper Stickers - 4
I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight!.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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