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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of black comedy dvd and other funny jokes |
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School Joke for Kids
A woman decided to have a face lift for her birthday. She spent $5000 and felt really good about the result. On her way home she stopped at a dress shop to look around. As she was leaving, she said to the sales clerk, 'I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?' 'About '35
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Men Joke
Men are like. . . Men are like animals: messy, insensitive andpotentially violent, but they make great pets.
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Birthday Joke
Sam's girlfriend's birthday was the same day as his father's. He bought his girlfriend a bottle of perfume and his father a pistol. He wrapped the perfume and wrote a note to his girlfriend, saying, 'Use this all over yourself and think of me. ' Unfortunately he put the note on his father's present.
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Weather Joke
Q: What did the thermometer say to the other thermometer? A: You make my temperature rise.
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Romance Joke
What is the difference between men and women?A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
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Funny Joke
Yo family is so poor that when I went inside your house I accidentally stepped on a roachand your whole family came out singing, 'Clap your hands, stomp your feet, thank the Lord that we got meat!'
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Assorted Joke
A neatly dressed salesman stopped a man in the street and asked -'Sir, would you like to buy a a bottle of this mouthwash for $200. 00?'Aghast, the man said, 'are you NUTS?, that's robbery!'The salesman seemed hurt and then tries again -'Sir, since you are a bit irate, I'll sell it to you for 1/2 price at $100. 00?Again, the man replies bluntly - 'you must be crazy pal, now go away!'The salesman then reaches into his briefcase and pulls out 2 brownies and begins munching away on one of them. He tells the irate guy -'Sir, please share one of my brownies since I have annoyed you so much'. Unwrapping the brownie, the guy takes a bite; suddenly, the guys spits it out and says:'HEY, ' he snarled, 'this brownie tastes like crap!!!''It is, ' replied the salesman. 'Wanna buy some mouthwash?'
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Parent Joke
For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, 'Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?' Tommy burst into tears and confessed, 'I think Mommy ate it!'
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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