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No animals were eaten, killed, maimed, wounded, slightly
injured, experimented on, tortured, eaten, sacrificed, frightened,
bullied, teased, humiliated, tickled, upset, ravished, tantalized,
pulled out of a hat, dishonoured or criticised during the making of this
website. Some jokes however were severely tortured in an effort to make
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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of akala comedy and other funny jokes |
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Bumper Stickers - 1
Nice guys finish last and bring you breakfast in bed.
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Dumb Blonde Joke
Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
She didn't want to wake the sleeping tablets!
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Mad Joke
With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society. . DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to a control group of0. 2 percent. PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting a new one. CHILDAGRA - Men taking this drug reported a sudden, over-whelming urge to perform more child-care tasks - especially cleaning up spills and 'little' accidents. COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle. * Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new clothing. BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts after taking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can be continued for a period longer than your favorite store's return limit. NEGA-VIAGRA - Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently undergoing clinical trials on sitting U. S. presidents. NEGA-SPORTAGRA - This drug had the strange effect of making men want to turn off televised sports and actually converse with other family members. FLATULAGRA - This complex drug converts men's noxious intestinal gases back into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be doubled for long car rides. FLYAGRA - This drug has been showing great promise in treating men with O. F. D. (Open Fly Disorder). Especially useful for men on Viagra. PRYAGRA - About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave men in the test group an irresistible urge to dig into the personal affairs of other people. Note: Apparent overdose turned three test subjects into 'special prosecutors. 'LIAGRA - This drug causes men to be less than truthful when being asked about their sexual affairs. Will be available in Regular, Grand Jury and Presidential Strength versions.
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Joke of the Day
What do a blonde and a beer bottle have in common? They're both empty from the neck up!
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Law Joke
Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called 'Divorced Barbie'?
Yeah, it comes with half of Ken's things and alimony.
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Spoof Joke
Boy #1: Hey! Didja know that my grandfather was once face-to-face with a panther? Boy #2: That's nothing! My granny was once face-to-face with a lion! It was drooling. . . coming closer. . . closer. . . Boy #1: Gosh! What'd she do?Boy #2: She moved away from the cage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Bible Joke
A man was driving from New York to San Francisco. He got as far asCleveland, when he realized he was getting terribly horny. So he looked up a house of ill repute and took care of the problem. Immediately, a severe guilt reaction set in, so he went to confession. For penance, he was told to say '10
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Salesmen Joke
A salesman walking along the beach found a bottle. When he rubbed it, lo and behold, a genie appeared. 'I will grant you three wishes, ' announced the genie. 'But since Satan still hates me, for every wish you make, your rival gets the wish as well -- only double. ' The salesman thought about this for a while. 'For my first wish, I would like ten million dollars, ' he announced. Instantly the genie gave him a Swiss bank account number and assured the man that $'10
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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