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Welcome to our archive of jokes, riddles, poems and .
. . everything!!!
Over the years we have published over 100,000 jokes,
50,000 poems, 40,000 riddles, 20,000 pictures, 10,000 funny articles
and 2 combine harvesters.
So have a look around, enjoy and get those crops cut
as soon as possible!!!
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Joke Archive : 100,000 Fabulously Amusing Jokes |
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Archive of afghan pashto joke and other funny jokes |
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Worlds Best Joke
Why does the wind always go west to east in Wyoming?Because Nebraska sucks and Idaho blows.
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Spiked Humor
Here's some sure signs you may be a Canadian. . . You're not offended by the term, 'Homo Milk' You understand, 'Could you please pass me a serviette, I just spilled my poutine. ' You know what it means to be on 'pogey'. You know that 'a mickey' and '2-4's' mean 'Party at the cabin, eh!!' You don't hold your hand on your breast when you sing the national anthem. You can drink legally while still a 'teen'. You don't give a hoot about the fuss with Cuba, it's just a cheap place to travel to and has good cigars. You're not sure if the leader of our nation has EVER had sex and don't want to know if he has! You get milk in bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs. You know that Mounties 'don't always look like that. ' You know that Canada is the only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground. You dismiss all beers under 6% alcohol content as 'for children and the elderly, and for export to the US'. You are excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada. You believe 'the Canadian Conspiracy' should have won an Oscar. You laugh afterward at some U. S. citizens' lack of knowledge of Canadian geography, but you are too polite to correct them. You design your Hallowe'en costume to fit over a snowsuit. You have more miles on your snowblower than your car. You think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons. You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car. At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant. You frequently clean grease off your barbeque so the bears won't prowl on your deck. The municipality buys a Zamboni before a bus. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
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Funny Kids Joke
Why do ducks have webbed feet?To stamp out forest fires!Why did the pig go to the casino?To play the slop machine!What is a pigs favorite ballet?Swine Lake!What do you get if you cross a hen with a dog?Pooched eggs!How do you stop a rooser crowing on Sunday?Eat him on Saturday!Why did the foal cough?Because he was a little horse!What is the opposite of cock-a doodle-doo?Cock-a-doodle-don't!What's the best way to keep milk from turning sour?Leave it inside the cow!Where do milkshakes come from?Excited cows!
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Kids Joke
What is the difference between boogers and spinach? You can't get your kids to eat spinach.
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Joke for Kids
A couple are driving along the freeway and the husband, who is driving, is complaining about everything . . . the heat, the long drive, the bad drivers, the country, etc . . . and his wife is getting tired of his depressing talk. So she says to him: 'One more complaint and I'll cut your penis off with my pen-knife'. About half an hour later, he starts complaining again, and before he could blink his wife pulls out her knife, slices the guy's dick off, and throws it out the window. Driving behind the couple's car is a family of three : husband, wife, and a 8 year old daughter. The penis lands on their car's windshield, and the father, in an absolute panic (as he doesn't want his daughter to see the penis), quickly turns on the windshield wipers (to get the dick off the windshield, and out of view of his daughter). The observant daughter asks: 'Daddy, what was that?'Her father, still in a panic, says, 'Oh it was only a. . . . . uh. . . . . . . . butterfly'. 'Must've been a big butterfly, ' replied the daughter. . . 'Did you see the size of it's dick!
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Romance Joke
The Yuppie showered a Yuppette with gifts for over a month. He took her to fancy restaurants and expensive resorts. Finally, he proposed, 'Bernie, if you will marry me, I have enough money to provide you with anything your little heart desires. ''Sorry John. ' she replied. 'I'm not ready to settle down yet. And besides, you can't buy my love, but if the price is right, I might see my way clear to rent you some. '
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Worlds Best Joke
Q: What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?A: A quarter-pounder with cheese.
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Dirty Joke
Q: Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white? A: So he can tell if he is coming or going.
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Note : Many of our jokes have been
submitted by guests - if you find any that are offensive please let
us know and they will be removed immediately. |
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