The World Famous Coltness Chess and Lap Dance Club
History of our Club
Coltness Chess and Lap Dance Club is a unique concept in entertainment. First established in 1923 the club struggled for many years trying to raise competitive teams with a dwindling membership. In 1998 the newly elected club president, Mike Andover, made radical changes. By combining lap dancing and chess the club was transformed overnight. In its first year of this new format membership rose from 17 to 203. During that year the teams won 6 major competitions and 2 national dance awards. Suddenly there was silver in the trophy room! We now boast 812 regular members and many members who just like to come from time to time. Our new purpose built club house is open seven days a week. With special playing areas, bars and restaurant you cannot fail to be impressed.
The club is also very proud of its dancers. As well as local talent we regularly invite guest dancers from all around the country. We even have celebrity nights and have seen excellent dance routines from the likes of Paris Hilton and Pamela Anderson. Each night up to six dancers entertain our players between moves. Chess has never been such fun! Lap Dancing has never required so much concentration.
Tours: Our A team, plus two of our full time dancers, have just completed an exhausting two week country wide tour - visiting 12 clubs. Playing a total of 72 games Cotltness A team achieved a remarkable 52 wins and 7 draws.
Visiting Clubs: Recent results -
Coltness A v The Bankies 8-0
Coltness C v Royal Albert 7-1
Coltness D v Yoker Mill 3-5
As always we are delighted to invite clubs to visit us for a friendly challenge. Our club secretary will be happy to arrange dates and select a team of similar grading to your team.
New members are always welcome - come along and give the club a try. Whether novice or grandmaster there is sure to be something at Coltness Chess Club for you. Unfortunately we are not permitted to entertain under eighteens at the club.
Our new club house has several playing areas, two bars and a small but highly rated restaurant.
Dancers - new dancers are always being sought. Top rates paid. If you have never danced around a pole before why not give our amateur night a try - come along any Friday evening.
Franchise Opportunity: Although Coltness is a non profit organisation our tremendous success has resulted in many requests for us to set up more clubs. We have finally succumbed to the pressure! With the help of our friendly bank manager and advisors we have created a franchise - ChesStrip. The first two clubs will be up and running in about two months.
If you are interested in opening up a ChesStrip Club in your area please request our franchise package. Let our expertise be the key to your business success. Applicants must be graded chess players with a keen interest in promoting chess as well as operating a profitable business.
For membership information or to visit the club contact our Membership Secretary: coltnesschessclub(at)yahoo.com